I told you all last month that I was going on a silence retreat in late October. I will tell you all about it, but first, I will tell you what I expected.

I thought that when we went into silence, the outside world would fade away, I would turn inward and I would have deep thoughts. I thought that by the end of the weekend, I would have worked through some of the stuck emotions that I have and would have cried a lot (in a good, releasing way).

That did not happen, but it was a really good weekend full of learning about myself. I also came away rested and eager to reconnect with my family and work life.

This is how we did the silence retreat. I am sure there are many ways. Three of us rented a cabin for the weekend. There was enough room in the cabin where we each had our own space and there were many comfortable shared spaces to choose from. There was also a lot of opportunity to be in nature, either outside at the cabin or walking through the neighborhood. We set a time to go into silence. At that time we would no longer talk to each other or even look at each other. Each was free to do what they wanted, but the idea was to not take in external information. So we could write, but not read or use our phones.

1. Immediately, I noticed how connected I am to the outer world. As a mom, I have learned to always be alert, especially listening to all the other people in the house. It took me overnight and into the next afternoon, before I was not constantly aware of where the others were. They were adults…there was no need for me to keep track of them, but it is a deeply ingrained habit. Releasing that sensory connection to others was restful and so needed.

2. Second, I noticed that it took a long time for my thoughts to slow down. I spent time in meditation and restorative yoga poses. I spent time watching nature. By the end of the weekend the number and content of my thoughts changed and my mind became much calmer.

3. I realized how much I seek information from and connection to others. When I went for a walk, I realized I usually look at all of the houses and try to learn about the people that live there. I seek to learn about my natural surroundings. I seek to understand what motivates people around me. On my walk, I challenged myself to just focus on my path, the ground in front of me. It was really difficult. It took effort. However, it opened up a new way to be on a hike. It helped me to slow my thoughts and to realize more about myself.

We are all seekers. Some seek connection to people, some seek information, others seek physical challenge. It is good to evaluate what it is we seek and then take a small break from it, just to see what else may come up. What do you seek?

4. I worked on my personal practice. For the past few years my personal yoga practice has been intertwined with all of the trainings I have been in and with my teaching (seeker of information…). I realized that was no longer what I needed. I came out of the weekend with a practice that can bring me stillness on a daily basis.

5. I slept. I slept so deeply and longer than I have in a really long time. By the end, I was so refreshed that I couldn’t wait to get back home to my family and daily life.

So, it was not profound. It was not emotionally-charged. It was mundane. It was a weekend of not a lot going on and of connection to small, subtle things. It changed how I perceive my daily life and myself. I changed my personal practice. It was life-changing.

If you have a chance to go on a silence retreat, I recommend it. It may be an emotional, cathartic, earthshaking experience. However, if it is not, something deep may still happen. You may learn about how you currently move through life and the things that no longer serve you. Or, maybe they serve you, but you may find that you need to make room for other things.

Silence allows for deep reflection and a kind of rest that we cannot achieve in a world where information is constantly coming from all directions.

I wish you all moments of silence and profound rest.